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Initiation

Past Thursday, August 30, I finally initiated the new tool. Boy oh boy what an initiation that was!

First I energized a medicine wheel and set down in the middle with the tool. Sage smoking to clean the tool from everything that does not belong. After that the initiation ritual. I ask spirit, mother earth, devas, nature spirits, all elements and kings and queens from the 4 directions North, South, West and East to help channeling the supposed energy for this tool. When the energy entered, I got tremendous pain on the back of the upper body at the height of the heart and from left to right. Felt like a thick bar. Sealed the energy in the tool and ended the ritual.

Started rummaging through the garden, trimming some bushes, when suddenly the bar in my back became a spasm top to toe. This spasm accompanied me for three days slowly settling.

The energy suiting the new tool is, among other things, love for every part of oneself, even the frightened one. Communication with and messages from celestial forces, supporting the trust in one’s vision of spirits and ghosts. The tool thus is a supportive companion in my process to leave fear behind.

Here the tool after initiation.

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Ghosts

Today finally another coaching session after the summer heat. It’s a bit of a prolongation of what was seen in April. First I cleared away some questions around what’s going on in the family before we could concentrate on my process again. There is a lot going on between my children.

This morning I saw the week ahead message here

My reaction was kind of irritated: ” and if at all I have to choose it’s the Nature child, that sweet little girl rummaging through the garden, smelling every flower I once was.” Let alone that exactly this theme came around in the coaching session.

All the hell with my legs since November.  “There is something with your pelvis….”

“Christ, I went to the doctor last week with exactly the same feeling but he denied and refused a scan as I wanted.” Suiting the fact, I happened to find over the years, that I am prone to misdiagnosis. It’s not the first time.

“… and a blood control if potassium and sodium are alright.”  “Will ask for it.”

Then the prolongation finally came – baby again but with another theme.The painting I made in May showed it.

Baby hanging in the middle of the red line having connection to the red part on the right, but only with the male – not with the female energy because I prevent that. Why? Within the fear I wrote about here there is still left the fear of the female clairvoyant talent – especially ghosts in all their forms. The fear of feeling everything is gone. I have to admit that I never ever watch scary movies, movies with ghosts and so on. But that fear is rooted far back in my childhood when I still was able to see but could not handle it and nobody believed. My mother was afraid of her paranormal talents too.
When one has the talents of clairvoyance, clairfeeling and hearing to help people on their path one cannot exclude a part of it – one has to go the full way with all that present itself. So again working with the blue tool with the seal.

“That’s it for today….pauze… me filling in with “we have to make another appointment now” “That’s right, end of september but there is hesitation, a picture, all of the tools you’ve made there is one you have to use until the appointment.” ” OMG 25 tools and only one of them…how…” I answered all alarmed.. “What was the last you made – that’s the one.” “Sunday, yesterday I made one and it had to be made and I almost initiated it too. Now I do it today.”

When my friend gave me the branches Friday evening she kept saying that she liked the curved one the most and I was completely happy with the parakeet feather…. should have known….Besides that we talked about the nasty energy you can get into your house when you buy Indonesian puppet-dolls or a Kris. Again I could have known this was the theme to come.

Helpers

Obviously I’ve got personal. Two of my friends started to collect branches, feathers and other stuff for me.

Friday I got a bunch of small branches, a not so fortunate little den with roots that did not manage to survive and lots of feathers. The other friend brought stuff from the jungle to work with.

Today, without any hesitation, I took a little curved one which had to be united with a little feather of a parakeet. Finishing touch some rope from Bali I wove golden sewing threat around. Also I had to draw some black signs on it.

Cleared all the dried stuff in the Municipality’s planter. Due to this never-ending summer heat without rain for weeks a lot of stuff died. I found another branch with root. Also found a little feather from a magpie. Here the result.

Irish

In 2003 a friend took me to Ireland for vacation. Along the roads you see evergreen hedges. The last day I was able to find a tiny little branch with roots to take home. I placed it into a wet handkerchief and the handkerchief into a plastic bag.

Home again I immediately planted the little fellow into my garden and it grew very well. Until now I managed to get ten offshoots from of it. Some I gave away as present. I kept the original and four new offshoots, al grown up and making little rose-coloured flowers.

August 3rd, while rummaging in the garden, one little branch came of the mother plant with roots.

Today I gave it colour and a tiny little gray feather from a baby crow that flew into my house several days ago. The tool is not yet initiated.

Gedicht

Naar aanleiding van  http://heldenreis.nl/schrijfveren  voor de maand augustus weer eens een gedicht


Nooit meer een spreekbuurt houden
Over een kindertijd vol spoken
Het op eieren lopen van de angst
Wel misschien van dingen die
Toch wel heel leuk waren
Het geratel van de telefoon met draaischijf
De nieuwe hoekbank in de keuken
Met van die kleppen en onder het hoekgedeelte
Een holletje om te verstoppen
Ondanks alles of juist daardoor
Alles overleefd
Het was een lachertje gezien wat later kwam
Nieuwsgierigheid als deugd
Weet ik zo net nog niet – teveel ervan is minder
Het jachtseizoen geopend toen ik vrouw werd
Belanden in het luxe bed van lust en wat zo liefde heet
Ontdekkingsreizigster in mannenland en geen benul geen routekaart
Een goede voorbereiding hierop node gemist
Onbenul vol onbevangen lezen van mijn levensboek
Het grandioze waaien door de dagen
toilet maken voor de looks en de disco en de eerste ridder met of zonder paard
de kans nihil geacht er een te vinden met zo weinig zelfbewust en vol van twijfels
dan toch gelukt een kort geluk
de tweede gauw getrouwd
de tent heel snel vol houten speelgoed voor
de kinderen die kwamen
geen onbewaakte ogenblikken meer
geen tijd voor lezen maar wel schrijven
dagboeken vol
ook onverzamelde gedichten zo nu en dan
diep van binnen de wens ooit een boek met mijn naam op de rug
maar ach, met kind en man
nog steeds die hoekbank van weleer
zaten wij te eten
het tafelzilver van mijn ouders in gebruik
en hun servies
geen geld maar wel de geur van munten ruiken
wie het kleine niet eert….
huisvrouwenslavernij zo dacht ik toen
dan brak de pleuris uit
de man bleek al twee jaar een verhouding te hebben
met een kleine middenstandster
ik wil niets weten
ik wil niet vragen
mijn hart is ijs
strooiwagens vol liefde zijn verdwenen
we gaan verhuizen

halve maan mes waarmee familieperikelen geheeld worden

en energetische banden verbroken

3rd eye

Today I started a new tool. I know it is one for myself, that’s for sure.
On the branch:

  • Pine cone as a metaphor for the pineal gland that activates the third eye. The pineal gland actually looks like a little pine cone.
  • Herkimer Diamond: crystallized light energy, a spiritual tool for energy work, light work, dream work, shamanic work, healings, receiving visions and making contact with angels and other higher energies
  • Mangano calcite: the essence of self-love, guide spirit away from over-analyzing tendencies, help to simply accept and radiate unconditional love, connection with angels, healing trauma of the inner child, soul healer
  • Hazelnut: joy and pleasure for life itself, full connection with the body, wisdom and protection

 

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