The Full Moon of May 21 brings the long-awaited portal to the new way of being on the base of what has been and has been seen, healed, kept for its worth or sorted out because it is not helping anymore. The new route is to be seen and connections to be made between past – now – future. The urge for release and relief I surely feel and crave for.It’s time for faith in Self.


Many iris blooming in a wide variety of colors.
A vast multiplicity of vantage points, ways of being, complete identities. Fabulously suggestible and impressionable. Fanning out in all directions, becoming one with everything. Desiring and needing to bring forth each self you have ever been, every fancy you are filled with, you are impetuous, outrageous, and irrepressible. Freedom at all costs. The moment prevails. Ferment and flux. A great difficulty in holding steady, perpetual adolescent rebellion, and the magnificent ability to become absolutely anything. Experience is all. Your deepest need is to embrace your astounding nature and let it be free, despite all signs to the contrary.
A collection of large dried leaves, each one bearing an inscription.
A neatly compacted little world. Everything fits together splendidly. Each detail is highlighted, mentally known to be right where it belongs. But everything is static. No movement destroys the coherence. You remember the way it is supposed to be and reconstitute all good things from the past, while inwardly craving to break through to something new. The familiar mental categories accompany you everywhere. Knowing exactly what is happening is highly valued. A thousand practical gifts are made easy. Everything works smoothly. The socio-cultural sphere is well-served. But underneath, slowly, gradually, you are losing all interest in this pattern and seeking a way out of it, which in the fullness of time may be there if you can let go of the need to please everybody and make perfect sense and discover the great bulk of your being lying dormant, waiting for the future to dawn. Needing relief and release to feel alive again and to know that it is possible to find real satisfaction in living.
Inside degrees by Ellias Lonsdale


Books – I love books.


the readers path by Jeremiah Morelli

Three years ago, before moving to the new house, I went through all my books and sorted out the ones to go. I gave them to other people who were interested. It would never occur to me to throw away a book.

Today there was the one exception – I went through that book, which was disappointing right from the start a year ago, again and pulled out the spare pages where I found some catching words. This action yielded eleven pages – the left overs so to speak. Putting those lines together and all is said that really matters – at least to me. The rest of the book went in the trash.


Following now the passages I found worthwhile to share.

If we fail to know the inner self, our spiritual and creative re-sources remain inaccessible. Every mystical tradition requires inner exploration, which bring greater depth and substance to the person.

The soul is not a static entity but an ever-moving energy, nurturing us towards wholeness until we at last learn to see and accept the incongruity in the world, ourselves and other creatures. We learn patience with ourselves and others and from this acquire inner strength to face our psychological pain. Jacob Needleman

As we continue the inward journey we develop our intuitive radar. We gain the ability to know all is well in the midst of tragedy and chaos, for then we truly begin to identify ourselves with a greater reality. Julian of Norwich

We have to recognize our unmet juvenile fantasies and wishes. Once we recognize them we can redirect our attention away from feeding them toward unlocking our imagination – the experience and situation of another being without seeking selfish gratification, pleasure or notoriety. D.W. Winnicott

The imagination is the key to a vibrant life.

Ancient Celtic people gave birth to the prototypical psychospiritual nature paradigm: communing with horses for human development, awareness and spiritual growth. Interaction with horses highlight the defenses every human being has, that stand in the way of thrusting people into ever-increasing levels of awareness. By accepting the equine reaction, a person commune with the heart of nature while also questioning personal habits and beliefs. Dialoging with a horse was also a vehicle for intensifying intimacy with GOD because they believed that GOD speaks through all creation.

Not only horses provide this to us but all living creatures – animals and plants. What comes into your life surprisingly is a wake-up-call for your awareness why this animal of plant has visited you and/or is reacting in some particular manner.


Anam Cara the soul friend
John O’Donohue describes the anam cara as a person with whom we can share all secrets of our lives. such a friendship cuts across all convention, allowing us to be fully recognized and accepted. This person or animal is literally a friend of our soul, joining us in ways that transcend our everyday perceptions.

Our soul has a different learning style – it absorbs lessons in indirect ways – by exposure, immersion and osmosis – as if by transfusion.

A healthy ego does not think – it just is, serving the psyche and working in concert with the soul (superego) and the instincts.

According to Pelagius we can know only that mystery exists, but we cannot know mystery. Its magnitude is beyond comprehension because it is transcendent, immanent and inconceivable. He also stressed the sanctity of allcreations – the beauty of nature is a reflection of GOD – and he urged people to care for animals and plants for their own sake.

John O’Donohue writes in Anam Cara We have falsely specialized the eternal world. We have driven the eternal out into some kind of distant galaxy. Yet the eternal world does not seem to be a place but a different state of being.

Thomas Merton advocate practical methods of spirituality for true transformation and enlivening spirit.The so called spiritual life through churches/religions could be cured by a simple respect for the concrete realities of everyday life, for nature, the body, one’s work, friends, surroundings etc. A false supernaturalism which imagines that the supernatural is a Platonic realm of abstract essences totally apart and opposed to the concrete world of nature, offers no real support to a genuine life of meditation and prayer unless it is firmly rooted in practical life.

If all worldly components are not in finest condition there will be no spiritual life. No Roots no Wings – keep your life, your body, children, work,finances, environment and relationships in shape.


The actual word religion from the Latin sacer and facere means “to make holy or sacred”, to sacrifice to a higher purpose. According to Joseph Shipley: “Since that which is made holy is given over to the Gods, from a human point of view it is given up.”
By yielding or sacrificing in this way we unite our finite human resources with the limitless resources available implanted in our soul.

Communion – contact with the informational morphic resonance fields of Dr. Sheldrake
“From the point of view of morphic resonance, rituals make perfect sense. By consciously performing rituals in as similar a way as possible to the way they have been done before the participants enter into morphic resonance with those who have carried out the ritual before in the past. there is a collapse of time. there is ab invisible presence of all those who have done the ritual before, a transtemporal ritual community”

The pulse of nature, repeating patterns spiraling through infinite time.


Within the article of my previous blog there where several links to tests and I am always curious. Down here you see the outcome of the tests with my comments.


Passionate & Full of Zest


Based on your associations with the abstract, you are a dramatic, creative, self-confident person. You are hungry for life and love having a good time with people always around you. You love challenges and using your mind to solve the most difficult problems or using your strong arguing skills to get yourself out of tricky situations. Sometimes you can get consumed by your own ego and ignore the needs of others, but most of the time you have too many friends because you are so generous and loyal. Arrogance and laziness are flaws that you can sometimes exhibit, but when you are set on achieving something, and passionate about what you are doing, you will stop at nothing to succeed. You are sincere and expressive with your heart and love communicating how you feel to those you mean the most to you. Your zest and energy is contagious.

The result is really true.

Composed & Collected: Thick Boundary Emotional Type

You have a thick boundary, which means you easily brush aside emotions to handle situations in a calm demeanor. You are prone to reacting to trauma with feelings of emptiness, numbness or detachment from reality. Although you are not as transparent with your emotions, this doesn’t mean you feel your feelings any less, in fact studies show that thick boundary individuals have intense levels of emotional reaction that can be seen through bodily indicators like heart rate, blood pressure etc. Although on the surface you may seem collected, you have a deep, empathetic and heartfelt reaction to your surroundings.

** Based on the book “Your Emotional Type,” by Mike Jawer and Dr. Marc Micozzi, Healing Arts Press/Inner Traditions, Rochester VT.

True – especially ‘you easily brush aside emotions to handle situations in a calm demeanor’. And yes my emotions are to see in my body language and body reaction only.

Blue Eyes

Inner strength and physical strength are two traits you posses, but many people may not see that about you. In fact, most people don’t often see the real you and might negatively judge you before getting to know you. People may see you as shy, untrustworthy, or weaker than you really are.

The Daily Mail reported, “in 2006, German psychologists found that blue-eyed children tended to be wary of new things and were considerably less open around their peers.”

Do you find that people treat you a certain way because you have blue eyes? It was reported in Medical Daily, “many people perceive people with blue eyes as being ‘competitive’ and even ‘egotistical’.”

Regardless of all these negative estimations, a pilot study conducted by the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine discovered that women with lighter-colored eyes seem to tolerate pain better during childbirth than those with darker eyes. They also appear to handle the stress of childbirth better.

Dr. Inna Belfer of the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine says, “In a study involving 58 pregnant women — 24 with dark-colored eyes and 24 with light-colored eyes — those with lighter eyes achieved greater reductions in postpartum anxiety, depression, and catastrophizing/rumination.”

If you are someone with blue eyes, maybe it’s possible that your curious yet cautious nature comes across as being aloof to others.

Bull’s eye again, especially the part about the childbirth – no problemo at all.

Try them too.

It has been proven that highly creative people’s brains work quite differently than other brains.

Source: 10 Things to keep in Mind When Loving a Highly Creative Person

After a restless morning I finally had my coaching session. We spoke about some questions I had sent by email. The attention concentrated on the last question: why am I afraid of bliss?

“There is a block on bliss by a part of you. This part makes associations as follows:
poverty = simplicity
wealth ruins everything so the world shows – those rich people who think they are more than others…
If I deserve this (emphasis on ‘deserve’) than I cannot be myself
If I’m thát basic I lose contact to Higher Self
This part associate also bliss = money and other material possessions.

So it’s too hot to handle/have.

However the painting and the tool Bliss are not only about money.

The painting is unconditional wealth – thus the pure energy of money and other wealth related inner riches. It’s the people who made the energy of money and wealth ugly. Bliss is pure fortune and luck – in whatever forms it comes to you. Bliss for example can be the fact that I always get hunches about my health so things cannot get out of hand. Unconditional wealth for example can be a loving happy relationship and if it is money than in the purest way.

“Now the new tool – it is the inner marriage of man and woman who get things into real flow in reality. Where do you want to place it after initiation?”

“In horizontal line above the painting of unconditional wealth!”

“There has something to be done first. The painting has to be lowered to the same level as Bliss.”

Here I burst out laughing: “That’s humor, really spirited humor…” “Why? What’s so funny about it?”

” For the last 2 days that painting came of the wall with nail and all. This morning also and I just got it back in place. Now I understand the falling down – there was a reason.” My coach now laughed also. Some practical issues came to mind. For example more wholes in the wall and I do not have the colour anymore it was painted. “There will be a way – this are the steps – we are weaving connections now – it is important, you can do it. The whole will be on the move the next time because the tree-painting has to be involved too.” “A dreamcatcher to cover it all, my friend from http://www.atelierlazuli.nl can weave this when the time is right.”

End of session. The fun stayed and I bike to the Do-it-self-shop to finally get some proper equipment like concrete nails and hooks.After really a lot of tryout’s I finally managed – see the photo.

new tool in place

A very hot day today – too hot to handle outside, unless you want to look like a boiled crab.

Instead I celebrated it creatively. A new tool is born – yet not smudged and initiated – that will come the next week. Made of black bamboo with on top a dried Camellia flower.




Bamboo (Bambusa Vulgaris)

Protection, Luck, Wishes. Excellent for magick wands, representing all four elements. “Growing up from the earth through water, it passes through the sky as it reaches toward the fire of the Sun.” http://www.earthwitchery.com

Spiritual: Bamboo totem possesses the following virtues:
Luck, love, longevity, spiritual centeredness, happy family relations, straightforwardness,sincerity, peacefulness, resilience, the ability to bend with difficulty rather than be broken by it, altruism, strength, tenacity, artistic inspiration, and rapid personal growth. http://www.astralmagick.com/astral-magick-bamboo-totem-topart-37.html

Camellia (Camellia japonica)
Feminine – Moon – Water

Camellia flowers are used to show thankfulness or to bring riches into the life. You can place fresh blooms in water to bring prosperity to the altar during a ritual. Chinese medicine men used this for skin condition treatments traditionally. http://www.earthwitchery.com

old trees


Scientist examined 700.000 trees all over the world. The surprising result: how older the tree the quicker they grow. Those old trees produce three times more biomass than the young smaller ones. So old for trees does not mean sick, weak, bent and vulnerable – to the contrary –  strong, powerful and more productive than the young ones.We need old trees as weapon against climate change. from Peter Wohlleben’s book ‘Das geheime Leben der Bäume’

Why do we humans cut trees on young age? Only for the profit – like everything we do that ruins Mother Nature! Trees need to grow old to do their job in Mother Nature’s indefectible plan. It’s a great and important job they have.

There is more to the equation but a thought came up as follows.

If it is right, that ‘as above so below – so outside so inside’ we could see this young vs old trees story also as a mirror in how we treat old people.

oudThere is a deep believe that, when people get older, they, without any doubt, will become sick, weak and unproductive. That is not according the human design – we only forgot how to stay in shape. If living a healthy life without, among others, the negative believe of surely aging 100% cracky, you will not end as lousy rotten old hump. Negative belief’s and nasty habits has to be turned around and your DNA will follow.


And if trees mirror us – how we handle a forest so we handle old people. But here also is right that old people are more productive than youngsters – because they are wise and therefore stronger. They live more easy-going and provide a lot of wisdom while youngsters are more voracious for life and are learning by doing all sorts of stupid things. It’s time so think about this and treat trees and elderly people with the respect they deserve!


Another similarity between trees and humans: where the old people live Trees on scanty soil change their habitat for the better and grow old – so can we. And sometimes living on scanty soil later appeared to have been just a blessing in disguise.




Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 106 other followers