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Archive for the ‘Love’ Category

Medlar

Spirit works in mysterious ways. Yesterday I saw a detective series within the detectives wife is going to make Medlar’s Jelly. She told her husband the detective: “ It has to be made by rotten medlars….” and his face expression was hilarious. This morning the thought process around Medlar’s Jelly started, above all the mention that the medlars has to be rotten….The Medlars Jelly is described as utterly delicious and beautiful to look at – amber with pink highlights and very glossy.


Even Shakespeare wrote about the Medlar in Romeo & Juliet:

Now will he sit under a medlar tree,
And wish his mistress were that kind of fruit
As maids call medlars, when they laugh alone.
O Romeo, that she were, O that she were
An open-arse and thou a poperin pear!

Further my thoughts went to ‘rotten’ bleeted Medlars. In the state of bleeting it suites transformation – only if we rott we can grow – only if the Medlars are rotten you can make new delicious jelly or jam of them. Same as in life I would say. Surely suiting all the rotten folks in politics and the money world. It all has to become so rotten that there is no further denial possible that it all has to change. Than we can build new livable conditions – making tasty jelly or jam.

Getting more and more intrigued by the Medlar, I came across this:

Medlar (Mespilus germanica):

Message:

“You feel very lonely at the moment, I can help you overcome this loneliness, I help you to be open to new insights and give you the courage to push your own boundaries. You are not alone.”

Light:
transformation; insight; self-confidence; healing; protective

Dark:
capricious, arrogant, fearful, crime,
Element:
Earth; Air

Energetic:
1st and 4th Chakra

Planet:
Saturn; Uranus; Sun

Season:
Spring; Autumn

Medical qualities:
use in case of constipation

Physical:
stomach; intestine; throat

Personal:
provides insight into your own skills; helper to push boundaries

Here I recognized that the Medlar is all around the transition we’re all in, suiting the upcoming New Moon. The retrograde Venus in Scorpio and Libra in this is like the bleeting process the Medlar fruit has to go through before it is sweet jelly or jam. That this little conversation in the detective series had such an impact on me show, that I’ m in the process and that I have helpful companions around me.

As mentioned above – the jelly has the color of amber and amber is all about the heart and love. Only lived from your heart and love sprout a good life.

More about the Medlar Tree

Would like to have one of the traditional Makhila’s made from Medlar tree wood

The Makhila is a wonderful symbol for the Medlar Tree being a protective companion on your path.

The recipe for Medlar’s Jelly

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The evening before the Full Moon I could not keep my eyes open, somewhere tears were stuck and I had a feeling on my chest as if I was going to have a cold. Went to bed at 22:00.
At 4:32 ‘o clock, right in time, I woke up and had the urge for immediate action.
Downstairs first thing was feeding the cat and made my morning beverages and lit candles everywhere. Sitting at my white dining table, I could see the Full Moon shining brightly.The cat came to lie next to me. Again the hassle with my eyes and a lot of yawning.
I hold the little self-love tool until 5:45 ‘o clock.
Went into the practice room and got on my knees on the white pillow. The Family Thing imaginary in my hands, felt big and heavy. Threw it into the Universal Energy saying that I gladly carried it but nothing to do with it and therefore giving it back. Universe will take care of the energy to go to its rightful owner.Then, finally, the tears came.

The Full Moon did its work. The days after this ritual I felt more alive and more active. My physiotherapist looked at me with the words: “you are much more in your skin and you look more balanced….” . Only thing left to do -> the painting.

Pushing artistic outlet doesn’t work so I patiently waited for the urge to start painting. High Noon today there it was – a quiet invitation….Let my hands move as they wanted until the flow stopped.Here it is – me facing the family and more – it’s kind of good-bye and hello at the same time.

 

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The Family Thing

On Twitter there was this #Septemeer2018 creativity going on. One painting or drawing a day with the theme the sea. One day, after painting I had a lot of different colors left. What a waste I thought so I put all the left-overs on paper and whipped through them with paper towel and brushes until my hands got no more impulse to move. Let it dry while cleaning the area. Set it against the wall and the immediate thought was: The Family. A heavy kind of thought, theatrical like Cosa Nostra, the Mafia or something like that. As a matter of fact I liked it.

This afternoon, a coaching appointment and no idea what would come up. Just before the appointment I had the insight that I had to use the tool self-love this time.

We indeed talked about what it means to me and if I think I love myself totally. Thought yes but, unfortunately there still is some resentment. Sorted through myself and came up with: “My oldest part does not.”

Not that easy because what’s my oldest part. I thought backward so it had to be the child but that was not the case. The picture of an old woman manifested.

I thought of the above painting and bingo. It is The Family and I’m standing with my back towards them on the right. Why? There is still angst that they influence me in a negative way…. but they don’t, to the contrary. I have to let go of the angst and the leg problem will faint away.

Speaking of the legs….

My physiotherapist, who also practice cranio sacral therapy, had information for me last thursday. I told my coach what she said and based on the confusion I had due to the information, another old karmic thing opened – the oldest part – way way back in the female line of my mother. I remembered a family constellation when I had positioned my mother, grandmother and great-grandmother and me. Nobody talked, nobody laughed, nothing, heavy energy. Until grandmother finally admitted that it was her fault that her son voluntarily went into war and died – which was known by my mother and true. Grandmother after that was able to bow for her mother. great-grandmother asked for the thing and grandmother gave it to her. Suddenly we all burst into laughter, my mother was so funny and able to see me and talk to me – a big relieve in the energy. great-grandmother on her turn gave it back to her mother and so on in a long row. The therapist then suddenly said she saw the one who had this thing first had come and took it back and that it was gone. Obviously this is not the case because today I got aware of the fact that I took the thing and the thing is blocking me.

The thing – very old – evolves around Guilt and Penance – mainly Penance.

Has nothing to do with me so I can let it go. How? “Throw it away with the intention to get it back in the line, into the Universe – it will find its way.”  Second step is another painting where I turn around – it will manifest like the other one above – don’t think about it. It may be an idea to stay awake tonight or wake up before the full moon. Again: don’t think about it, follow the flow.

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Initiation

Past Thursday, August 30, I finally initiated the new tool. Boy oh boy what an initiation that was!

First I energized a medicine wheel and set down in the middle with the tool. Sage smoking to clean the tool from everything that does not belong. After that the initiation ritual. I ask spirit, mother earth, devas, nature spirits, all elements and kings and queens from the 4 directions North, South, West and East to help channeling the supposed energy for this tool. When the energy entered, I got tremendous pain on the back of the upper body at the height of the heart and from left to right. Felt like a thick bar. Sealed the energy in the tool and ended the ritual.

Started rummaging through the garden, trimming some bushes, when suddenly the bar in my back became a spasm top to toe. This spasm accompanied me for three days slowly settling.

The energy suiting the new tool is, among other things, love for every part of oneself, even the frightened one. Communication with and messages from celestial forces, supporting the trust in one’s vision of spirits and ghosts. The tool thus is a supportive companion in my process to leave fear behind.

Here the tool after initiation.

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Gedicht

Naar aanleiding van  http://heldenreis.nl/schrijfveren  voor de maand augustus weer eens een gedicht


Nooit meer een spreekbuurt houden
Over een kindertijd vol spoken
Het op eieren lopen van de angst
Wel misschien van dingen die
Toch wel heel leuk waren
Het geratel van de telefoon met draaischijf
De nieuwe hoekbank in de keuken
Met van die kleppen en onder het hoekgedeelte
Een holletje om te verstoppen
Ondanks alles of juist daardoor
Alles overleefd
Het was een lachertje gezien wat later kwam
Nieuwsgierigheid als deugd
Weet ik zo net nog niet – teveel ervan is minder
Het jachtseizoen geopend toen ik vrouw werd
Belanden in het luxe bed van lust en wat zo liefde heet
Ontdekkingsreizigster in mannenland en geen benul geen routekaart
Een goede voorbereiding hierop node gemist
Onbenul vol onbevangen lezen van mijn levensboek
Het grandioze waaien door de dagen
toilet maken voor de looks en de disco en de eerste ridder met of zonder paard
de kans nihil geacht er een te vinden met zo weinig zelfbewust en vol van twijfels
dan toch gelukt een kort geluk
de tweede gauw getrouwd
de tent heel snel vol houten speelgoed voor
de kinderen die kwamen
geen onbewaakte ogenblikken meer
geen tijd voor lezen maar wel schrijven
dagboeken vol
ook onverzamelde gedichten zo nu en dan
diep van binnen de wens ooit een boek met mijn naam op de rug
maar ach, met kind en man
nog steeds die hoekbank van weleer
zaten wij te eten
het tafelzilver van mijn ouders in gebruik
en hun servies
geen geld maar wel de geur van munten ruiken
wie het kleine niet eert….
huisvrouwenslavernij zo dacht ik toen
dan brak de pleuris uit
de man bleek al twee jaar een verhouding te hebben
met een kleine middenstandster
ik wil niets weten
ik wil niet vragen
mijn hart is ijs
strooiwagens vol liefde zijn verdwenen
we gaan verhuizen

halve maan mes waarmee familieperikelen geheeld worden

en energetische banden verbroken

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The reception of the flow of intuitive information is getting better. Where I mostly acted without knowing why I had to do something to find out it was right weeks later, now I get it almost instantly but only if I need to know. So is the case with the tool I made June 5.

After receiving en reading the message of Aluna Joy on June 7, the insight came immediately – the tool has the same message but there is more and I have to work with it for more information. Tomorrow the tool will be initiated. I’m excited about what might come up.

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When I visited my friend for a birthday celebration I got, once more, a beautiful branch from Kerria Japonica Pleniflora.

Kerria japonica – Yamabuki – lit. mountain breath – a Buddhist symbol for mono-no-aware

Beside the branch I got three top pieces from the gourds, symbolism here , my friend makes her rattles of. This morning, in a flash, I got the inspiration so I started working on a new tool. It got a piece of amber at the top.
Also the antler, I recently bought, got a make-over with gold and silver and  a lizard on it too.

Deer totem’s and their antlers bring the message and meaning of higher connection and awareness. Antlers act as spiritual antennae. The lizard animal totem is also a reliable messenger from the spiritual realm.

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