Posts Tagged ‘trauma’

Had some painful crusts on my left ear shelf so I had to see the dermatologist. He concluded that it was chondrodermatitis nodularis helices. Popularly in dutch its called Kussenduiveltjes which means pillow devils. Suiting, because you only feel them when laying on your pillow on the ear.

After the treatment with nitrogen, I got a leaflet with info about the pillow devils and what might happen in case they has to be removed by an operation. I have to wait four weeks to see if they fall off by the nitrogen.

The folder explained: usually men get pillow devils. Among the women who got this condition were a lot of telephonists and NUNS …….

I laughed when coming to NUNS because I immediately thought about my two past life’s as a nun, especially the one in France in 1756 in Bretagne Kérity Abbaye de Beauport,which ended in me being murdered.

Felt some guilt because of the laughter – I have to respect the nun I once was. So I took the healing tool made when healing those life’s and I apologize to the nun of that time. Even my eyes were affected by this and for several minutes I couldn’t open them…..

It came to me, that the pillow devils are a clean-up of the nun’s trauma like the skin cancer in my neck was the clearance of the life’s in which I have been hanged, throat slit etc. That is how the body get rid of healed traumatic experiences in past life’s after they are healed on energetic level.


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How to Know When You’re Recycling Old Memories
However, for painful experiences where negative emotions arise, we are transported back in time to the age and space of the previous time(s) we’ve had a similar situation. We don’t know it’s occurring; we think we’re present, clear, and responsive to what’s real. There are earmarks to this process so we can tell when we are recycling:

  •  We experience pain, especially the pain of negative emotions like fear, worry, anxiety, anger, sadness, depression, humiliation, guilt, upset, isolation, abandonment, rejection.
  • We feel like it’s “deja vu all over again” — there’s a sense that we’re repeating a pattern, perhaps within a single relationship, sometimes across relationships. We have the same boss (in different skin) no matter where we work; we encounter the same type of relationship experience no matter who our partner is.
  • We feel like someone reminds us (not in a good way) of our mother, father, “ex”, etc.

When this happens, others may observe us as behaving in ways that are not typical for our personality. Indeed, as we are transported back to the originating misunderstanding or trauma, we will respond as if we are the age at which the original event occurred. In the most painful cases, we may experience post-traumatic stress reactions, which are more common than currently recognized. We experience fight-flight-freeze reactions as we are swarmed with stimuli that start a chain reaction in our energy field, personality, and physical body…..

This is especially relevant for the rest of 2012 as we go through a unique set of planetary events that seem custom-designed to take us into our wounded area(s) and heal them layer by layer…To heal through Sagittarius, we must befriend our animal nature — the wounded wolf, the starved kitten, the mighty lion..

Terry Lamb

As a friend once said: ” If you don’t let out the beast where is the beast hanging out?”

Your animal side – why being afraid of it? You may have a soft quiet animal, a small one, a big one, medium size, XXLL, an angry one. Or even something like the beast like the one from Beauty and the Beast. In this movie you saw, that love and patience, some adjustment, can turn a beast into a spinning kitten and having done that the door to your personal library swings open and your soul knowledge comes all back to you. The final fight is necessary to really let go….

Maybe this weekend see this movie with pen and paper and note down what is triggering.

Reading the article of Terry Lamb made me see why I had to dismiss my old blogs which described my way up to now and why I was furiously busy to adobe the header yesterday….back to the roots and animals…

Looking at the real life animal I have, Mrs.Henk, it’s all clear: as fast as lightning, cozy and cuddling, but afraid of some things…like my last tool told me I am…

Down animal memory lane: My first animal was a Fox Terrier who was quite a bundle of love and protection for the family. Still miss her a lot. The dog after that was a random moron my dutch husband brought home. The dog was abandoned by her owner for a long time and was able to even open the fridge on her search for food. Pie and poop in the house because she never learned to do that outside. What an experience, not suiting me…The last dog was  Berner Senner Benno. Wonderful but traumatized dog and nobody in the family could handle him. Able to  get a tree out of the soil, eating my doors and more. My cats never ever dare to come down from upstairs…. I found a new owner for him in the hills where he can stroll around. Has been told that he even sleep together with their cats…After Victory the strong cat (mine), Foufour the talkative tom cat (1 son’s cat) and tender anxious Zwelgje (1 daughter’s cat), Mrs.Henk came strolling to my door all wounded and stayed for recovery – a hell of a picture suiting my inner world..

A dream I once had told me that I have the keys to every single cage to free the animals. And after I did I met a group of wild and free living horses and wolves which I joined to live with ever after. That would be a tremendous joy to me…..

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